It was simply a large boar, being held in place by orders from the king, but then it seemed to shake and when its eyes opened again it was Eki looking at me.
[ A teen girl's voice comes on over the walkies. Sounding slightly hopeful, but like she's trying to hold back. Wanting to confirm for herself. Unsure. ]
[ Hearing Randvi like that breaks Maddy's heart. She glances over at Levi Jr., who is clearly the happiest and most excited she's seen him in a long time. She slides away from him a few feet, not wanting to disrupt his happy mood.
She drops her voice low. ]
Randvi - Randvi - What the fuck is wrong with with you? Why do you sound like that?
[ Maddy can think of a million possibilities and they all make her heart want to twist in on itself. She is also struggle with the twin urges of "respect Randvi's sacrifice, because she died to save you and Maddy isn't sure she could do the same thing if the roles were reversed" and "scream at Randvi for dying like a stupid cunt". ]
[Levi's moved onto patrolling from inside the barricades once Maddy has the radio, so there's little chance of him over hearing her. He's gone back into serious mode, though, so she doesn't need to worry about disrupting his mood. The pigs already did it. But he'd appreciate it if he knew <3]
[ Now that she's sure Levi won't overhear, she's a little bit more harsh. It's out of worry, more than anything. The fear of, "What if Randvi doesn't come back?" had been real, and so had the fear that something would be wrong with Randvi even if she did come back.
And it looks like at least one of those fears has now been realized. But her worry manifests as teenage assholery, her voice needlessly cutting. She's still almost-whispering, too, even though she doesn't need to. ]
Uh, yeah. I can hear that. Randvi, what the fuck? Does it hurt?
[ Maddy involuntarily puts her freehand over her own throat. Imagines what it would be like to feel scars there. ]
Levi Junior was really happy to hear you were back. He woke me up, all excited and everything.
I can feel it, but it's not nearly as severe as acquiring the injury. I think that's normal. [Eivor had told her once that it hurt to sing, and she imagines the internal scarring here is similar.]
I was pleased to hear from him right away. I’d feared he might have left in my absence.
Then why'd you do that?! YOU DUMB BITCH!!! If you're afraid he would do something like that, why would you go and die? We could have fended them off! Probably. We could have tried...!
[ She understands how brave what Randvi did was, but it also hurt for her, and Levi Jr, and the others, to be left without her.
And it is terrifying for Maddy to be fighting the boars. She thought the boar beating eaten by the crabs would be the most fucked up thing she'd ever see in her life. She could not have been more wrong. She'd been in fights before, sure, but she'd never lunged at a living creature with the intent to kill it if she had to before.
Thinking about it makes her feel like her brain is shaking on the inside, so she just tries not to think about it. Levi needs help. He can do this all on his own. And Randvi...
Randvi's death improved the conditions. Maddy can't deny that. And what Randvi did was very brave!
But fuck!!! What if she hadn't come back??? ]
It's not fair. How come all these weirdos are so convinced we know about all this shit we're not even part of? Like, we didn't ask to be here either. Why can't they leave us alone?
[ She's thinking both of Eki and that freak in the cabin, who from Maddy's perspective, threatened her personally. ]
I didn't know how severe it was until it was too late to warn him.
[Though she understands this is mostly just excess emotion. They had all seen the mess the boars had left of Squalo.]
This happens whenever you're living in a new place, I think. [Pretty much this exact scenario, minus the evil magic, happens to them all the time in England.] Many people assume their own values are the only ones that should be heeded.
[ Maddy still sees Squalo's body when she closes her eyes sometimes. It makes her want to throw up. Or faint. Or something. Holy shit. She's never seen a person like that before.
Mutilated. Boars eating him.
She's only 18, but she feels like, since she's been on this island, she's aged 10 years. ]
You should know I would have been really pissed off if you didn't come back.
[ Maddy keeps thinking about how it sounded to hear Randvi die. She'd gone with Levi to the front of the picket to see it, but had turned away and covered her eyes, unable to fully bear witness to something so brutal. But she'd heard it. Unmistakably.
Now she can hear Randvi's voice again. But raspy. Hoarse. Not the same. ]
I hope so, too. [ It's not fair. It's not fair that people just do weird stupid shit and she can't do anything to stop them and everybody just keeps putting themselves at risk and being stupid. She wants to seem mature and grown up and like she can handle this, but she also wants to just cry. ] Randvi... I don't think I could have done that. What you did. Like, if it was me, and I had to do it. [ "I don't think I'm stupid enough," she almost says, and doesn't. ]
I didn't think I could do it either, until I had to. I know you don't know much about my people, but to die that way, on my knees… my family would never take me back, if they knew.
Really? Being Norse is so weird. [ She remembers what Randvi said about NOT being a Viking. ] If your family shows up, I won't tell them. I promise.
To be honest, I don't think my mom would like it if she knew that I was learning to fight with a sword. She'd probably be pretty upset. I can't just sit here and do nothing while other people fight for me, though.
[ "Kokichi cut somebody up!!" she wants to scream, but she doesn't think Randvi will understand why that's so disturbing to Maddy. It's not even that she's mad at Kokichi necessarily, but seeing Squalo that way had disturbed Maddy greatly. That someone's first instinct could be to so coolly start cutting into him is deeply unnerving to her, since she can't imagine having that as an impulse. She doesn't know how to explain it fully.
But Randvi said for them to be there for each other. Okay. Maddy can try to do that. ]
[ Maddy has slowly started to figure out that what's disturbing to her is not necessarily disturbing to the others here. ]
Okay. Are you sure you don't need help?
[ Not that Maddy is in any position to do anything if Randvi does need help. So like what's the point of asking, right? But she asks anyway. She's just not sure what else to do. ]
[ Maddy's voice is thick from the lump in her throat. ]
We will be. [ It's probably as foolish to say that and it is to ask, but Maddy doesn't know what else to do. ]
Randvi... I miss you. [ It's only been a few days, but Randvi is the closest thing to a "big sister" Maddy has here. And hearing Randvi die had been brutal. ]
Do you think your scars will ever go away? [ Maddy hopes they will, but she's afraid that they won't. ]
[It’s the 'I miss you' that makes Randvi realize that the difference in age between herself and Maddy is very close to the one between herself and Thora. She wonders if this is how her sister feels receiving her letters.]
I will return as soon as I can. You can call me any time.
It is difficult to guess about the scars since we have so little information about these carry-over injuries. I have a friend at home who has very similar scarring from an injury sustained when she was a child, so it is possible to live well this way.
[At least she doesn't have the teeth marks in her skull. Randvi doesn't think she’d look as good as Eivor does with the shaved sides.]
I have to look around, but I think I know where I am. Martin and Jet passed through here, but that was before the storm so I'm not sure how I’ll fare with the river.
I’m all right. No injuries that will affect my ability to travel.
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LV464J | text | before Dirk's death
Most of them left after you died, but there is a smaller squad still paroling. There have been no attacks and no injuries.
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You ordered me to stay and I will.
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The boar that killed me was Eki when it did so.
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I see. Thank you.
Where are you? Do you need assistance?
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I’m going to take a look around, but I think I know where I am. Martin and Jet passed this way.
I should be able to make it back on my own.
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LV464J | AUDIO | Literally seconds after the previous conversation
Randvi?
Audio
Maddy? Levi says there were no further attacks, are you all right?
Audio
She drops her voice low. ]
Randvi - Randvi - What the fuck is wrong with with you? Why do you sound like that?
[ Maddy can think of a million possibilities and they all make her heart want to twist in on itself. She is also struggle with the twin urges of "respect Randvi's sacrifice, because she died to save you and Maddy isn't sure she could do the same thing if the roles were reversed" and "scream at Randvi for dying like a stupid cunt". ]
[Not Here]
But he'd appreciate it if he knew <3]
[not herrrre <3]
Poor Levi. ;; ]
Re: Audio
Audio | from levi jr's callsign
And it looks like at least one of those fears has now been realized. But her worry manifests as teenage assholery, her voice needlessly cutting. She's still almost-whispering, too, even though she doesn't need to. ]
Uh, yeah. I can hear that. Randvi, what the fuck? Does it hurt?
[ Maddy involuntarily puts her freehand over her own throat. Imagines what it would be like to feel scars there. ]
Levi Junior was really happy to hear you were back. He woke me up, all excited and everything.
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I was pleased to hear from him right away. I’d feared he might have left in my absence.
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[ She understands how brave what Randvi did was, but it also hurt for her, and Levi Jr, and the others, to be left without her.
And it is terrifying for Maddy to be fighting the boars. She thought the boar beating eaten by the crabs would be the most fucked up thing she'd ever see in her life. She could not have been more wrong. She'd been in fights before, sure, but she'd never lunged at a living creature with the intent to kill it if she had to before.
Thinking about it makes her feel like her brain is shaking on the inside, so she just tries not to think about it. Levi needs help. He can do this all on his own. And Randvi...
Randvi's death improved the conditions. Maddy can't deny that. And what Randvi did was very brave!
But fuck!!! What if she hadn't come back??? ]
It's not fair. How come all these weirdos are so convinced we know about all this shit we're not even part of? Like, we didn't ask to be here either. Why can't they leave us alone?
[ She's thinking both of Eki and that freak in the cabin, who from Maddy's perspective, threatened her personally. ]
no subject
[Though she understands this is mostly just excess emotion. They had all seen the mess the boars had left of Squalo.]
This happens whenever you're living in a new place, I think. [Pretty much this exact scenario, minus the evil magic, happens to them all the time in England.] Many people assume their own values are the only ones that should be heeded.
no subject
[ Maddy still sees Squalo's body when she closes her eyes sometimes. It makes her want to throw up. Or faint. Or something. Holy shit. She's never seen a person like that before.
Mutilated. Boars eating him.
She's only 18, but she feels like, since she's been on this island, she's aged 10 years. ]
You should know I would have been really pissed off if you didn't come back.
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I hope this buys time for K and the others to reach you.
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Now she can hear Randvi's voice again. But raspy. Hoarse. Not the same. ]
I hope so, too. [ It's not fair. It's not fair that people just do weird stupid shit and she can't do anything to stop them and everybody just keeps putting themselves at risk and being stupid. She wants to seem mature and grown up and like she can handle this, but she also wants to just cry. ] Randvi... I don't think I could have done that. What you did. Like, if it was me, and I had to do it. [ "I don't think I'm stupid enough," she almost says, and doesn't. ]
I hope you'll be okay.
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To be honest, I don't think my mom would like it if she knew that I was learning to fight with a sword. She'd probably be pretty upset. I can't just sit here and do nothing while other people fight for me, though.
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I hope some of the others will be there soon. In the meantime, the three of you need to be there for each other.
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[ "Kokichi cut somebody up!!" she wants to scream, but she doesn't think Randvi will understand why that's so disturbing to Maddy. It's not even that she's mad at Kokichi necessarily, but seeing Squalo that way had disturbed Maddy greatly. That someone's first instinct could be to so coolly start cutting into him is deeply unnerving to her, since she can't imagine having that as an impulse. She doesn't know how to explain it fully.
But Randvi said for them to be there for each other. Okay. Maddy can try to do that. ]
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I am hoping to return relatively quickly, myself. Fortunately I can still walk well enough.
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Okay. Are you sure you don't need help?
[ Not that Maddy is in any position to do anything if Randvi does need help. So like what's the point of asking, right? But she asks anyway. She's just not sure what else to do. ]
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[She’s only been alive for a few minutes, there might be other problems she hasn't noticed yet.]
I know it sounds foolish to say right now, but please be safe.
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We will be. [ It's probably as foolish to say that and it is to ask, but Maddy doesn't know what else to do. ]
Randvi... I miss you. [ It's only been a few days, but Randvi is the closest thing to a "big sister" Maddy has here. And hearing Randvi die had been brutal. ]
Do you think your scars will ever go away? [ Maddy hopes they will, but she's afraid that they won't. ]
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I will return as soon as I can. You can call me any time.
It is difficult to guess about the scars since we have so little information about these carry-over injuries. I have a friend at home who has very similar scarring from an injury sustained when she was a child, so it is possible to live well this way.
[At least she doesn't have the teeth marks in her skull. Randvi doesn't think she’d look as good as Eivor does with the shaved sides.]
text | KD201D
It's very good to hear from you. What's your physical status? You know where you are?
no subject
I’m all right. No injuries that will affect my ability to travel.