text | day 008 | HE412T

[timaeus]

While I did anticipate finding myself in a brave new world upon stepping through that door, this isn't exactly what I was expecting.
Nor is this the company I was expecting to have.
I've been hearing a whole lot of strangers' voices coming out of this ancient piece of shit, and a notable lack of any familiar ones.
I also find myself somehow bereft of a number of items and abilities I should have had, many of which would have been pretty handy in what seems like a deserted island situation.
The rational question to ask here would be "what the fuck".
But just from eavesdropping on a few of y'all's conversations, it doesn't seem like anyone actually has the answer to that question.
So I'll skip the useless panic and confusion and whatnot and instead just ask:
Who was poking me and ran off before I fully woke up?
Fess up.

Comments

[salamanca]

[ ?????? ]

What is a fursona?

[timaeus]

[Oh, boy. Never had to deal with boomers before. This truly is a strange new world.]

Do you really want to know?
I'm down to explain but this might turn into a whole fucking lecture on niche subcultures and I've got some footprints I could be tracking right now.

[salamanca]

Yes I want to know! [ Lalo hates not having information, of any kind. ] Footprints will still be there when you're done lecturing. :)

[timaeus]

[He can multitask. He types while cautiously beginning to look around.]

Furries are people who're interested in anthropomorphic animals, usually through the mediums of art or elaborate mascot-esque costumes called fursuits.
It's not always a sexual thing, but there's a strong enough association that furries are frequently the subject of derision by other corners of the internet.
Fursonas are their anthro animal personas.

[salamanca]

[ What the fuck? ]

Fursonas have sex with animals!??? What kind of sick shit are you into, man?

[timaeus]

How about you reread what I actually wrote and try again.

[salamanca]

I did. I'm sorry. I still don't understand it. How do you know about all of this? Are you sure you should be following tracks by yourself after all? I do not think you are well.

[timaeus]

And I don't think you're actually literate, so it's a damn good thing neither of us gives a shit what the other one thinks, huh?

[salamanca]

:( I do care what you think! I don't want you to think I'm illiterate. But I've never heard of any of this before. Why are you being so mean? I'm sorry I said you were sick just because you want to fuck animals. I didn't mean it. :(
I'm not trying to be unkind. I'm just very stupid. Ask anyone here.

[timaeus]

Do people actually fall for this shit?
Just making sure I didn't stumble ass backwards into a universe of gullible shitheads.
Wouldn't wanna make anyone else feel bad for being perfectly adequate by local standards.

[salamanca]

:( What shit do you mean?

May I ask you a personal question? Then I'll stop bothering you.

[timaeus]

Nah.

[salamanca]

Please. It's very important that I need to know.

[timaeus]

[He just doesn't bother answering. Sorry, important footprints to follow here.]

[salamanca]

Helloooooooooo

[salamanca]

You shouldn't follow the footprints. It's dangerous. :(

[salamanca]

Are you all right? Still alive? Don't get shot with arrows now.

[salamanca]

Worried. :( Concerned. :(

[salamanca]

Hey, kid! Answer me!

[salamanca]

I was just kidding. :(

[salamanca]

Just saw your conversation with Det. Cohle. Please accept my apology. I didn't realize you were so young. I will leave you alone now.

[ Lalo's reasoning for this conclusion is simple: an adult would have no reason not to simply answer when asked directly about their age. Only a kid would play coy. ]