001 | TEXT | CALLSIGN: DI481O | MORNING 001

[salamanca]

Hello, everyone!

So, I'm no wildlife expert, but I thought you all might want to know: Looks like the kid and I just found a whole lot of birds that shouldn't normally live together. Some of them aren't even from the same hemisphere. [ Some, he's never seen before. ]

Usually, you only see so many different species together like that when people brought some of them. Or all of them.

[ This image taken seconds before disaster. ]

Comments

voice-to-text; SH442K

[sharktrash]

So what you're saying is, we're inside somebody's private zoo.

[ HE'S SEEN ENOUGH OF JURASSIC PARK TO KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING ]

text; DI481O

[salamanca]

I wouldn't go so far as to draw that conclusion right away, now. But it's a possibility.

[ One more message. ]

Hey, is this Spaghetti? ¡Hola, Spaghetti!

[ Take heart, Squalo. The birds will attack in four... three... two... ]

-> voice

[sharktrash]

...

[ it would certainly be a shame if something aggravated the birds further, huh ]

[ anyway, fuck this texting shit. ]

WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU CALLING SPAGHETTI?!!!

[ quit being racist Lalo, ffs ]

voice!

[salamanca]

[ There's loud laughter and a wheeze before he starts to bark out an apology, mostly because he's still pretending to be nice so he can't keep being as racist as he wants-- ]

SOR--

[ The wheeze and the words die as bird squawks and shrieks fire up around them. It sounds like there are feet pounding on the ground. Kokichi can be heard screaming. Lalo can be heard swearing. There are whooshing noises that sound like somebody is swinging the walkie through the air while more birds scream in the background. ]

[sharktrash]

[ music to his ears, truly. ]

[ serves you right, Burrito. ]

[ Squalo's just going to snort derisively at what sounds like a pair of idiots getting beaten up by birds, and then hang up. ]