voice; 001; morning; cw: language

[sharktrash]

[ SH442K | VOICE | 001 ]

Heeey! Anybody on this thing?! Hello?

[ There's a faint, static-y background noise; whoever is talking must be walking by the seashore, although his painfully loud voice drowns it out no problem. ]

Whose moronic idea of a joke is this, huh? You think you can just fuckin' kidnap me and-- what's the plan here, exactly? You gonna bore me to death with the shittiest cruise on il Mediterraneo?! At least have a goddamn drink stand, for fuck's sake -- who's in charge here? I wanna speak to your idiot manager, asshole, rapidamente, yeah I'm talking to you, the hell are you still playing this game for?! Just you fuckin' wait, I'm gonna find you and-- Oi, is this thing on? Hey! Hey--

[ The yelling will probably continue until someone deigns to respond. ]

Comments

[trialbyliar]

Ohhhh. Yeah, sorry about that! My bad, I didn't think you'd be this annoying. Really terrible kidnapping judgement on my part!

[He sounds far too nonchalant for someone claiming to be the mastermind behind this mess, so it's probably no surprise that he follows that after a pause for reaction:]

But I'm lying. I didn't do shit.

[sharktrash]

[ That might have been his plan all along! Annoy his kidnappers until they beg him to leave! Wait a second. ]

So which one is it?! Make up your damn mind!!

[trialbyliar]

[A scoffing sound.]

I just said I was lying, didn't I? I don't know what's going on here any more than you do. Unless maybe you're secretly behind this and just playing dumb...?

[sharktrash]

Sure. Who's to say you're not lying now?

[trialbyliar]

That is a possibility! But I'm not. How do I know you're not lying?

[sharktrash]

Am I supposed to just take your word for it? And you don't.

[ Except, he doesn't do that. Anyone who actually knows him, knows this. His team makes fun of him for being shit at hiding things. ]

[trialbyliar]

Duh! You should totally trust me. I'm a really trustworthy guy, y'know?

[ bruh ]

[sharktrash]

Uh-huh.

[ he's having some doubts there bruv ]